Please Don't Leave

The day came when my hero had to leave

I ran and hugged him, “Daddy, don’t leave me!”

I knew, even then, that his heart was torn

But his course was set before he was born

Everything in all our lives changed that day

In retrospect, it had to be that way

With my childish comprehension of life

I was excited about dad’s new wife

Since Mom had to move many miles away

Visiting us filled his vacation days

Vacation’s sunset drew tears out of me

I’d sob my heart out, “Daddy, please don’t leave”

I remember, my new baby brother

And when I met my awesome step-mother

Our visits were filled with quality time

Memories woven through this life of mine

Our stocking boxes and poker with change

Taco night at the campsite “mama’s” way

He tucked us each in bed when the day’s through

He’d sing to me, “Dream while you’re feeling blue”

My graduation summer, I received

A gift I’ll treasure for eternity

I came to California, to my dad’s

The greatest vacation I could have had

I’d never been in Daddy’s habitat

So it took a bit to get used to that

My little brother, about four or five

Was more fun than I’d before realized

On the way home, when my visit was through

I taught my brother how to tie his shoes

A rite of passage, to show I belong

I learned the California drinking song

My dad’s retired, my brother’s in school

Daddy, not one to follow all the rules

“Why are you requesting your son’s release?”

“The crappie are running, we need to leave!”

Since my teenage job was being reckless,

I moved down with Dad to escape my mess

My hero shared his home and family

Sacrificing their peaceful life for me

There was something I’d not before noticed

Daddy’s charm that nobody could resist

He taught me, “Say kind words as you pass through

Above all others, they’ll remember you”

When fairness seemed to pass over his plate

He spoke words of love and never of hate

He taught me of karma, like what that meant

What I receive reflects that which I sent

Life moved along, my babies, his grand kids

Daddy joined us on our annual trips

His jokes like, “How Long is a China man”

He kept them guessing, me, his greatest fan

When someone had me shaking my head,

My dad would say, “S/he’s young and foolish yet”

(That last quote you need to say with your mouth

To understand what I’m talking about)

One trip my daughter brought her friend that’s hot

We’re all walking across a parking lot

I said to him, “Daddy, are you okay?”

I’ll never forget what he had to say

“I was feeling pretty tired before

But now I’m feeling energized once more

With Michelle walking in front of me

I seem to have a lot more energy!”

As years progressed and Daddy’s health declined

I witnessed the dawning of Spirit’s light

It would take many years for me to see

Long before I did, he believed in me

I sat by his bed, would silently plead

Hoping he’d hear me, “Daddy, please don’t leave”

Mama assured me his time wasn’t yet

“I believe and want you to believe it!”

I did, he stayed with us several more years

With still more for him to accomplish here

He taught me more about the soul’s journey

And helped me analyze what I believe

I’m in that moment I’ve feared all my life

When Daddy’s soul has returned to the light

Every little piece of me wants to scream

Gripped in anguish, “Daddy, why did you leave?”

I sit at my table, begin to write

Without warning, Dad’s hand is guiding mine

He’s nurturing my soul with love and peace

And a calm assurance that he won’t leave